Marriage often begins with excitement, shared dreams, and a deep connection. But over time, misunderstandings, busy schedules, and life’s challenges can erode that bond. If you’re asking how to rekindle intimacy in your marriage, the good news is that it’s possible. Cathy Krafve, author of Marriage Conversations: From Co-Existing to Cherished, offers practical steps to move from co-existing to cherished while rediscovering God’s purpose for your and your spouse in the process.

“Marriage isn’t just about happiness—it’s about transformation,” Cathy explains. “It refines us, teaches us how to love like Christ, and gives us a glimpse of His purpose for our lives.”

Why Intimacy Fades—and How to Rekindle It

Every marriage faces seasons where intimacy feels distant. Cathy believes this often happens when couples stop prioritizing intentional communication. “Vulnerability is key to rekindling intimacy,” she says. “I call it ‘conversational adventures.’ It’s about being brave enough to share your fears, needs, and hopes. When we’re honest with each other, trust and intimacy grow.”

Forgiveness is another cornerstone of emotional intimacy. “When trust feels fragile, forgiveness is the first step toward restoration,” Cathy explains, referencing Matthew 18:21-22. “Jesus tells us to forgive seventy times seven—that’s 490 times. And let me tell you, my husband and I got there quickly! Forgiveness is a daily choice that opens the door to healing.”

Cathy encourages couples to also focus on shared goals. Early in her marriage, she faced a moment of frustration that shifted her perspective. “I sat down to make a list of everything that annoyed me about my husband,” she recalls. “But God nudged me to write down all the reasons I married him instead. That simple act reminded me of the good I was overlooking.”

Three Steps to Rekindle Intimacy in your Marriage

1. Practice Affirming Communication – Take time to listen to your spouse without judgment and express your needs clearly. “Honest communication strengthens trust,” Cathy says.
2. Prioritize Laughter – “Laughter is sacred,” Cathy shares. “It lightens burdens and knits hearts together. Marriage is weirdly hilarious if you let yourself laugh at the differences!”
3. Rediscover Your Why – Reflect on the shared dreams and values that brought you together. “When challenges come, your shared mission will remind you why you chose each other,” Cathy says.

God’s Purpose for Me Through Marriage

Cathy emphasizes that marriage is about more than just surviving—it’s about thriving. “God’s purpose for me in marriage isn’t about perfection; it’s about refining each other and growing in grace. When we take small steps to cherish our spouse, we move closer to the marriage God designed for us.”

Ready to rekindle intimacy in your marriage? Start today by reading the first chapter of Marriage Conversations for FREE.

Frequently Asked Questions About Rekindling Intimacy

Why does intimacy fade in marriage?

Intimacy fades when communication breaks down, or couples stop prioritizing their connection. Life’s stress can create emotional distance, but small, intentional efforts can restore it.

How can I rebuild trust with my spouse?

Start with forgiveness and vulnerability. Be honest about your needs and commit to small steps that rebuild emotional intimacy over time.

What’s one practical way to rekindle intimacy?

Laughter! Finding joy in small moments helps lighten burdens and rebuilds emotional closeness.

Ready to rekindle intimacy and rediscover God’s purpose for your marriage? Dive deeper and read the first chapter of Cathy Krafve’s Marriage Conversations for free! Order your copy today!